Inheritance. Webster's defines "inherit" as to receive money, property or title as an heir upon the death of the previous holder/owner. It also means to derive a particular characteristic, quality or trait from a parent.
Some qualities we may treasure...inheriting beautiful handwriting, wonderfully arched brows or musical ability. Those are the pleasant gifts that forever remind us of who we came from.
Unfortunately we can also inherit traits that -- unless mastered and controlled can overtake our lives, like anger, bitterness and impatience for instance.
When it comes to genetics we get no say so. What you see is what you get. I inherited my mothers winged eyebrows and green eyes but my father's blonde hair. I am a creative story teller like my paternal grandmother and have my maternal grandmother's high forehead. I have my father's hands and chin -- my mother's short stature and unfortunately...I inherited what I call "the big D". Type 2 Diabetes.
My maternal grandmother was a Type 2 Diabetic who was overweight for her height. In the late 1970's to early 1980's with little information available - about all she did to battle "the dragon" was to use insulin and try to lose weight.
Ten to fifteen years later my Grandmother developed an abcess on her foot that never healed which led to an amputation below her knee. I remember visiting her in the hospital and I will never forget the pain she suffered that was so intense she writhed in agony even with pain meds on board. It left an imprint on me and haunted my mother.
My mother developed Diabetes in her late 40's. She battled it for about 17 years before dying in 2012 from complications of the disease. She never lost her leg - which she feared greatly, but her kidneys failed. I watched as her life depended upon kidney dialysis but with every dialysis, it was as though the very machine keeping her alive, sucked the very life out of her.
Ten years ago, at the age of 44 -- the dragon bit me. When first diagnosed my doctor at the time handed me a prescription of Metformin, told me to lose weight and it would get better. That was the beginning and end of the education offered me at that point. I've battled my weight since I was 10 so hearing "lose weight" was like listening AGAIN to a broken record.
By the time the Dragon and I celebrated our 5th Anniversary I got to add a blood pressure medication to the routine and was using insulin. The dragon was delighted....me? Not so much.
Five years ago I was staring at my 50th birthday approaching in December 2010. I decided that for the first time I was going to give myself a gift for this bi centennial day. I decided that I was going to embark upon a journey to pursue a fitter, healthier me. I joined Weight watchers and I got active.
In six months time I lost 30 lbs and 3 pant sizes. I also got rid of the insulin. I felt so good and wondered why I had not done it sooner.
In the last five years I've endured quite a few losses of people very close to me. My father passed away from cancer in January 2011 followed by my mom in July of 2012. These losses rocked my world and wreaked havoc on my health. The Big D feeds off of adversity and grief and illness. With each loss I lost all motivation to exercise and the dragon only got more powerful. My arm wrestle with the Dragon was up and it was down.
In March I said goodbye to my uncle/brother. Billy was 8 years older than me and was a permanent installation in my life. I was born...there was Billy. He was more than an uncle to me -- he was the big brother I never had and one of my best friends. We were like two peas in a pod. The loss of him created the perfect environment for my diabetes to rage out of control. After Bill we lost our cat of 11 years and suffered another loss of relationship as well.
After Billy died the Big D took over. All summer I battled high sugar numbers and an inability to get going. My Dr. was worried about this inability to get the upper hand and he added a second drug. After several months of no success he switched to a new drug.. Victoza. This medication is relatively new in the Diabetes fight and is very expensive. I realized in more ways than one it was time to pull out the big guns.
For two months I sat and stewed. I knew enough from my first 30 lb weight loss that losing weight was in fact a great weapon against Diabetes. Id seen it happen. I'd also experimented with exercise in that I took a blood sugar reading before exercising and rechecked it after. I was astounded to see my blood sugar drop over 100 pts with only 30 minutes of exercise. Exercise is just as powerful as any drug we can take.
In my area I'd heard about a gym called Physzikque that holds a "12 week Challenge". You pay $50 to sign up and then each week throughout the 12 weeks the cost is $25/wk. This purchases you personalized attention from a nutritionist, personal trainer and accountability. I knew that accountability was what I needed. So I did it. I jumped off the high dive and paid the $50 bucks. No turning back.
That same day I had my check up with Dr. Sam and he gave me the bad news. My numbers were worse than they'd ever been. Obviously the dragon was winning. When I told Dr. Sam that I'd signed up for the 12 week challenge he was ecstatic. He gave me approval to do it with a date to go back and see him in December at the end of the challenge.
Saturday I attended the orientation. I was instantly excited when I walked in to pumpin music and took my place alongside of about 60 other people. The median age was about 30. There were about 6 people in the 45 and older bracket.
Ive been filled with excitement today knowing that tomorrow is the start of a whole new chapter in my life. I will never be who I am today, again. It inspires me to think that in 12 weeks I will be a different person. I will be stronger, fitter, smaller, but most importantly I will be healthier.
This program awards a prize to the biggest loser. The #1 loser wins $10,000! I know that is exciting but I'm not in it to win that money. I'm in it for one reason and one reason only --- I want to slay my dragon. My goal is to lay Diabetes to rest in my body. I hope that when December 21st rolls around, my 55th birthday, I will no longer be on diabetes medications. And I am hoping that the blood pressure medication goes the way of the dragon as well.
I decided I would blog this 12 week journey in hopes that maybe, just maybe it might inspire others and inspire myself to keep going.
The Pages of yesterday cannot be revised
but the pages of tomorrow are blank
and you hold the pen.
Make it an inspiring story.
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